The "Pragmatic" Mulled Wine

The Scene: It's a cold, dark November night. You're having friends over, or you're just cozying up by the fire. You want a drink that is, quite literally, a warm hug in a mug. And let's be honest... you have a bottle of red wine that a guest left, and you're pretty sure it's not very good.

The "Pour Man's Proof" Take: This is the ultimate "value" move and the entire spirit of "Pour Man's Proof." The best use for a cheap, boring, or just "meh" bottle of red wine is to mull it. Don't waste your Caymus (4/5) or DAOU (5/5) on this. This recipe is designed to take a $10 bottle of Merlot or Cabernet and turn it into something delicious, aromatic, and magical. It saves a "bad" bottle, makes your entire house smell like a Williams-Sonoma store, and warms you from the inside out. It's not just a drink; it's a pragmatic winter life hack.

Recipe & Directions:

1 bottle (750ml) dry red wine (Merlot, Malbec, Cabernet Sauvignon—just make sure it's cheap and dry, not sweet)

1/4 cup brandy (Optional, but it adds a crucial warming kick)

1 large orange, sliced into rounds (plus more for garnish)

1/4 cup maple syrup or honey (You can add more or less to taste)

Mulling Spices: 2-3 cinnamon sticks, 4-5 whole cloves, and 1-2 star anise. (Tip: Wrap the cloves and star anise in a small piece of cheesecloth to make them easy to fish out later.)

How to Make It:

Combine all ingredients—the wine, brandy, orange slices, maple syrup, and mulling spices—in a large saucepan or pot.

Heat over medium-low heat. Stir gently until the sugar/maple syrup is dissolved.

Crucial Step: Do not let it boil! You want to warm it, not cook it. Boiling will burn off the alcohol and make the spices bitter. Just let it get "steamy" (about 15-20 minutes).

Once it's hot, turn the heat down to the lowest possible setting. You can let it gently infuse for up to an hour.

Ladle into mugs, garnish with a fresh orange slice, and serve.